My Birthday Thoughts

Today is my 39th birthday. While brushing my teeth this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and thought about myself at 19, and tried to remember if what I am at 39 is what I pictured then. I couldn't remember. At 19, I was dating my ex-husband, working at an engineering firm and attending community college. Now, I'm divorced for almost 8 years, working for an attorney, and enrolling in graduate school.

One benefit of being 39 is that I've got a lot of experience (and, not that *kind* of experience...get your mind out of the gutter :p). I analyze situations for solutions and I have trust in myself to get things accomplished. I'm not afraid to ask questions when necessary.

I do not mean to imply that I have found inner peace. There are many aspects of my life that I think require a ton of work, and I have difficulty motivating myself for issues related to my personal care (emotional and physical).

I have repaired my relationship with my parents and I have a deep respect for my younger brother, who I am proud to point out to people that we are related (although I am not so sure he can say the same).

No matter how much I want to, I'm not going to annotate my resolutions or plans for my 39th year. I'll just build them up in my brain and report on them as I feel necessary.

I actually have a Christmas tree this year, complete with real presents around it (not underneath because I'm in a small place and this is a table top tree - complete with fiber optics). One picture is with the flash (no lights) and the other is sans flash (fiber optics glowing). For the first time EVER, I realize how quickly Thanksgiving turns into my birthday turns into Christmas.