Saturday, September 17, 2011

America's Next Top Cat

My Delilah is a model.  Seriously, she's so beautiful - on the outside.  Her personality is, well, let's say, not so beautiful.  Delilah could definitely be a contender on the feline version of America's Next Top Model.  If there were such a thing, here's how I imagine it:

All Delilah needed was a trim to her honey-blond locks.  Typical wannabe-model drama when the finished product revealed the cut to be shorter than what Delilah wanted.
It's Makeover Time!

Time for the photo shoot!  The shoot was outdoors, early morning, and the theme was luxurious living by the pool.  

"Delilah, look directly into the camera"

"Delilah, show me vulnerability"

"Show me Madonna vogue-ing but then at the last minute scale it back a notch"

"Great profile shot while showcasing your fluffy belly!"

"Show me relaxed but with controlled lines"
Time for judging panel and we will see which cats will continue in the search for America's Next Top Cat.  Delilah, we edited your film heavily.  There were so many shots of the *exact* same pose.  You can be a bit too boring, and your small body mass and frame mean you have to work harder to get that extra strong photo.  These were the best pictures of your film:

"Your paws look awkward in this picture but as a beauty shot it's good"

"Your face caught the light beautifully"

"At this angle, your paws look huge, but the toe fluff is a nice touch"

"I feel the action coming off the picture - your face is bringing it!"

"You lost your face in this shot but  there is a market out there for paw shots"
And the award for best picture goes to....Delilah!  Congratulations, you are still in the running in the hopes of becoming America's Next Top Cat.

"You are beautiful but you have an anger that makes you push too hard
to the point where you lose focus and become to difficult to work with" 

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